Where can I start? I have all of these wonderful and 'profound to me' thoughts and then when I come to write them on 'paper' they seem to fall flat! I've never been very eloquent but writing out my thoughts does help me if nothing else.
I've been wanting to come back to blogging but my fear has stopped me. The fear comes in so many packages. Some are small and some are big but they are still fear no matter their size or how pretty they are packaged.
My recovery from my two surgeries in April have been slow. My stomach pains have mostly dissapeared (finally- thank the Lord!) but I fear that if I move or stretch that things will become 'undone' and that I'll land myself back in the hospital. Being in a foreign hospital for two weeks was stressful and trying. Also in April I had a sever flare up with my Plantar Fasciitis which has hindered me from simple walking due to the pain every time my left foot hits the floor. I have found minor relief in splints and specialty shoes and have realized that I must work through this since nothing seems to be working for me.
And with all of these circumstances it seems that my goal to be 'Thin Within' is even more elusive than in times past. I thought I had obstacles before (ie the flesh and my self-will) and now I've got to throw these things into the mix and it's left me feeling a bit hopeless.
My lifestyle has been pretty inactive. It has only been for the past two weeks that I have finally started to walk again and try to get myself moving.
After writing my thoughts above I have realized that my biggest fear is not losing weight. It's the fear of failure. And yet my identity isn't defined by MY failure but by the Almighty God who lives in me. He can NEVER fail! There are so many scriptures that tell God's children To "Fear Not" and here is one of them I've just looked up.
Isaiah 41:13 "For I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee."
Imagine that- God holds my right hand and has said He will help me!
I will choose to listen to the Voice of Truth!
